'roid rage is a live and well at our home.
Most days Emily is very good at controlling it, but sometimes it is just too much for her. I understand how they make her feel a lot better thanks to Take Me Home from the Oscars; Arthritis, Television and Fashion By: Christine Schwab. In her book Christine talks how the steroids affected her and I can see some of those same things in Emily. Trouble sleeping and anger are the big ones we deal with.
So last night when that angry monster got the better of her I employed some technique that I thought I'd share.
First; I have to recognize where the tantrum is coming from. Part was her not getting her way, part was the steroids. I blame the steroids but she could also just be frustrated with everything that has happened to her lately. I know I am frustrated just watching this disease and all the side effects from the medicine.
Super tantrum stages:
1. Whinny, super whinny with a touch of "I'm about to scream in anger." in her voice.
2. Anger, screaming at the world. Sometimes with words, sometimes just loud screaming.
3. It all comes off. In the hospital she would throw the pillows off her bed, last night she threw her clothes. This is the glorious half-way point.
4. Sad crying, no more screaming just tears and sometimes a; "I want my mommy". This is where mom or dad swoops in to comfort her and tell her it's going to be OK.
So to handle this I put on my patient hat and wait out the first three stages. My husband and I will acknowledge her anger and even empathize with her, but we make sure she knows how she is dealing with it is not acceptable. She does not get what she wants.
At the last stage we swoop in and comfort her and talk about it. Why did she feel so angry? Why did she scream? How can we handle this differently next time?
They have improved since we left the hospital, but any tantrum is not fun in my book.
Showing posts with label Sleep. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sleep. Show all posts
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Exhaustion
Out of sheer exhaustion I let Emily sleep in my bed last night. I just am not able to function well waking up 3 to 4 times a night, getting up at 0530 for my work out, working all day and then getting back home to clean, cook dinner and spend time with both children. I am pooped. If I am honest too I don't clean much in the afternoons and dinner is so low key I'm not sure you can count it for much effort on my part.
It's kind of ironic because now we will have to work on getting our son to sleep in his own bed to make room for his sister so I can get some sleep. The irony comes from the fact that we worked to get Emily out of our bed when our son was born.
If we want to have any more children we will need a larger bed. Which brings me to another point that bothers me. Before SOJIA my husband and I were ready and wanting another child. I was looking forward to coming home from deployment and starting an adventure leading to a third child. Having a child who is so sick and will be for a long time sure cured that desire. Eventually we will probably have another child, but I thought it might be a possibility this month and completely freaked out. Probably because of the exhaustion; up three times with Emily, once with Thomas and let's see with a newborn that is about four to five more times a night. I would never sleep.
I feel guilty that I got upset about the possibility, especially now that it's not. Derek handled it much better then I and was even excited about the possibility so maybe in a few months we can consider it. Once we are better at managing SOJIA we can think about it again. I'm not getting any younger and I think there is at least one more member of our family waiting to join us. I'll have to talk myself into it.
It's kind of ironic because now we will have to work on getting our son to sleep in his own bed to make room for his sister so I can get some sleep. The irony comes from the fact that we worked to get Emily out of our bed when our son was born.
If we want to have any more children we will need a larger bed. Which brings me to another point that bothers me. Before SOJIA my husband and I were ready and wanting another child. I was looking forward to coming home from deployment and starting an adventure leading to a third child. Having a child who is so sick and will be for a long time sure cured that desire. Eventually we will probably have another child, but I thought it might be a possibility this month and completely freaked out. Probably because of the exhaustion; up three times with Emily, once with Thomas and let's see with a newborn that is about four to five more times a night. I would never sleep.
I feel guilty that I got upset about the possibility, especially now that it's not. Derek handled it much better then I and was even excited about the possibility so maybe in a few months we can consider it. Once we are better at managing SOJIA we can think about it again. I'm not getting any younger and I think there is at least one more member of our family waiting to join us. I'll have to talk myself into it.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
Night is not my favorite time of the day. Emily does not sleep through the night and honestly never really did. So I have a hard time believing parents who tell me their six week old sleeps through the night. Really? Neither of my kids ever have. My two year old is getting better and there are some nights he does go all night, but even that took two years.
Emily hates nights too. I am not sure if it's the disease, or maybe the medicine, or perhaps just this whole traumatic experience, but she will cry during the night and usually wakes up to get a new ice pack for her injection site and then another time to go to the bathroom. If I am on the top of my game I try to include both things in one wake up. Usually I am not. Usually I am lucky if I can be and loving mother at those times. Not that I am mean to my child, but I am most definitely not happy to be up that late/early.
The worst part is when she just wakes up crying. It must be some form of a night terror because she won't tell us what is wrong or respond to us. So I just lay next to her waiting for her to wake up more or stop and tell me whats wrong. The thing about the crying that makes it hard to deal with, for me, is that I can't take away what is making her cry. I can't stop giving her the injections (lately those have been very hard for her to take) and I can't make this nasty disease go away.
Emily hates nights too. I am not sure if it's the disease, or maybe the medicine, or perhaps just this whole traumatic experience, but she will cry during the night and usually wakes up to get a new ice pack for her injection site and then another time to go to the bathroom. If I am on the top of my game I try to include both things in one wake up. Usually I am not. Usually I am lucky if I can be and loving mother at those times. Not that I am mean to my child, but I am most definitely not happy to be up that late/early.
The worst part is when she just wakes up crying. It must be some form of a night terror because she won't tell us what is wrong or respond to us. So I just lay next to her waiting for her to wake up more or stop and tell me whats wrong. The thing about the crying that makes it hard to deal with, for me, is that I can't take away what is making her cry. I can't stop giving her the injections (lately those have been very hard for her to take) and I can't make this nasty disease go away.
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